Let’s Get Realistic About Failure

I’ve spent the greater part of my life shielding myself from failure, from not being good enough. That fear sent shivers down my spine, enough for me to not even try, and 24 years later, here I am, wasting away as a server at a country club, not amounting to much of anything. Finally, my complacency came to a screeching halt. I was not proud of who or where I was in life. I blamed anyone but myself, the economy, Obama, my mom. I didn’t realize the hold that this fear had over me. I refuse to settle for a life I hate because of my fears and insecurities, and nothing in this world will change, unless you change. The biggest change one can make is facing and overcoming that overwhelming and anxiety ridden fear of failure. In hopes to not only motivate myself to overcome this irrational fear of failure, but others too, I have set forth a list of five things to remind you to embrace failure, not run from it.

 

  1. Failure is the only road to success

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If you do not try, you do not succeed. It’s as simple as that.

  1. Failure is your best teacher.

The greatest thing about failure, is that it is a stepping stone to success. It teaches you what works, and what doesn’t. It is a tool you should use to your benefit. It is something you should learn to welcome, and learn from. It is your biggest ally in a world of foes.

  1. Everyone fails at some point.2

Walt Disney was told by his former newspaper editor that he “lacked imagination, and had no good ideas.” Look at him now. He’s not the only one, Einstein, Stephen King, Elvis Presley, etc. They all had to overcome failure and the grappling fear that accompanies it. Instead of succumbing to this fear, they let it motivate them, which, brings me to number 4:

  1. Failure is your best motivator.

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It’s like that whole reverse psychology deal, if someone says you can’t prove them wrong. Or if you’re anything like me, it’s like getting stuck on a Candy Crush level. Months and months of built up frustration as you fail over and over and over, and that heartwarming, freeing sense of accomplishment that takes over your body once you beat it. More importantly, what causes that sense of accomplishment? It’s your body releasing dopamine, a chemical released by your brain that produces a sense of pleasure, which in turn motivates you even more.

  1. Not trying is failing.

4

Let me say it a little louder for the people in the back

NOT TRYING IS FAILING

If you think by not trying you are in turn avoiding the chance of failure you are wrong. You are failing yourself. You are letting that fear run your life, and the worst part is you are failing and not gaining from it. At the very least failure is a necessary tool to succeed, but if you refuse to try, you are robbing yourself of the opportunity to be someone you are proud of. You are stealing your dreams from yourself. You are sabotaging your life goals and accepting defeat by forfeiting. You are accepting that you are not good enough, and that you are not worth the attempt.

 

Failing is a common part of life. It is something that we look at negatively, when in reality it is the biggest asset to success that we have. Robert Kiyosaki, an amazing author and real-estate multi-millionaire, said it best, “Successful people don’t fear failure but understand that it’s necessary to learn and grow from.” We should all start to accept that failure and success go hand in hand. We need to learn to welcome failure, not shy away from it.

 

Sources:

http://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/15-highly-successful-people-who-failed-their-way-success.html

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-athletes-way/201112/the-neuroscience-perseverance

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